The Most Attractive 25 Under 25

There comes a point in any Top 25 countdown where it may (or may not) be appropriate to insert some levity into the situation. This summer the Copper and Blue contributors (myself included) compiled a Top 25 Under 25 countdown for players in the Oilers organization. The evaluation centred on important hockey-related characteristics, things like points scored, save percentages, potential, readiness for the NHL, track record (possibly we even considered how much we each favoured a player), and other suitably serious categories.

There was, however, one category we did not consider while complying this list: attractiveness. This may seem like a superficial assessment (and it very well could be), but like in most areas of life, attractiveness is a beneficial trait to possess. Hockey is truly no different from the rest of the world in this respect, for all that it is a sport seemingly designed to destroy attractiveness. One or two pucks to the face will take care of even the most refined profile.

Seeing this not inconsiderable gap in our evaluation of the players under 25 found in the Oilers system, some type of analysis had to be done, and a Most Attractive 25 Under 25 had to be created. Never let it be said that we’re not thorough at Copper and Blue.

Upon deciding that such a ranking needed to be made, I determined I should be the contributor responsible for crafting it. There is a reason for this is that as a woman, most men seem to assume I watch hockey for the players anyway. Having dealt with this asinine assumption for many years, it seemed only fitting I be the one to create a ranking based solely on that in which so many assume I’m interested. This list is a small way of turning the tables on those who believe I only follow hockey for the player’s looks.

It should be noted there is nothing scientific or analytical about this list. It is quite simply composed of those players whose looks I like best. Seriously, there is absolutely nothing scientific here. I spent some time on Google comparing faces.

For the most part, the more symmetrical a player’s face, the less evidence of puck damage, and the more proportional a face seemed to lead to better rankings. Players lost points if their faces seemed too square, too long, or too young or old. Next time, I attempt to compile a list like this I will be using the d-hotness analytic.

There has been some discussion behind the scenes at Copper and Blue about what type of analytics could be used to measure hotness and the associated variable of coolness, but nothing conclusive has been decided. Currently we favour the measure of d-hotness over Hot Corsi, but have yet to reach a consensus. (I told you we were thorough.)

d-hotness is as a relative measure and is explained as a measure of expected hotness versus actual hotness. However, as bituman explains it best, I'll just leave this quote here.

Which regression variables to use for our differential? Age, race, religion, size, class (sometimes a white collar just won't do), political persuasion and, of course, stick length and curvature of the blade.

Such a differential statistic would require both "expected" and "actual" components.Expected hotness is the normative score that one would expect. Actual hotness is actual hotness. d-hotness is the difference between expected & actual hotness.

Craig Simpson, for example, has always had a pretty high expected hotness score. Facial symmetry, nice eyes, strong jawline, looks good for his age, etc. His actual hotness, however, does not really exceed his expectation. Simpson probably has a pretty low d-hotness.

On the other hand, Peter Chiarelli has a pretty low expected hotness. But when he puts on those Oilers track suits, I have to admit he exceeds expectation. Peter Chiarelli has a high d-hotness.

Now to the list!

Honourable Mentions:

David Musil
John Marino

Top 25:

25. Ben Betker
24. Bogdan Yakimov
23. Kyle Platzer
22. Mitchell Moroz
21. Joey LaLeggia
20. Dillon Simpson
19. Aidan Muir
18. Roman Horak
17. Keven Bouchard
16. Ethan Bear
15. Taylor Hall
14. Griffin Reinhart
13. Brandon Davidson
12. Nail Yakupov
11. Ryan Nugent-Hopkins
10. William Lagesson
9. Connor McDavid
8. Jujhar Khaira
7. Eetu Laurikainen
6. Caleb Jones
5. Leon Draisaitl
4. Anton Lander
3. Darnell Nurse
2. Oscar Klefbom
1. Laurent Brossoit

I’ve put together my list of the most attractive Oilers under 25; I’d invite you to do the same if you disagree with me or ask me why a player ranked in a certain position.