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Open Thread: All Star SuperSuperSuperSkills Showdown

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Electric Boogaloo

Pick a bar?  What the hell does that mean?
Pick a bar? What the hell does that mean?
Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports

Drop whatever it is you're doing, it's time for the skills competition!

Connor McDavid is the lone representative for the Oilers at the 2017 NHL All-Star Weekend.  Tomorrow will bring the 3-on-3 tournament that everyone's been just dying to see, but just hold it right there.  Before we can get to all that action tomorrow, we've got to get through tonight. Tonight, we get to watch Edmonton's 20-year old captain thoroughly dominate at least two events.  Really, he'd probably dominate more than two events, but for whatever reason the NHL had to include at least a couple more players to participate in the other events.

McDavid will be featured in the Accuracy Shooting competition, as well as the Fastest Skater competition.

Both CBC and Sportsnet will have the broadcast at 5 PM.  As the events unfurl, we'll have updates of each event, we'll certainly have winners from each event, and there'll be some general snarkiness along the way.  Updates follow this line.

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THE FOUR LINE CHALLENGE

This event will never be allowed to happen again.  My God, what a mess.  Drew Doughty can't pass, Ryan Suter can't hit the broad side of a barn.  Coyotes goaltender Mike Smith scored through a one foot gap in a giant shooter-tutor from his own goal.  The Pacific All-Stars got 20 points for that.  It feels like Drew Carey is scoring this in a "Whose Line Is It Anyways" format.  Nothing is real.  Eat at Arby's

ACCURACY CHALLENGE

The one with the foam targets in the net that blow up when pucks hit them.  Everyone hit all four targets.  Results:

Kyle Okposo:  15.970 seconds

John Tavares:   28.8 seconds

Connor McDavid:  15.64 seconds

Patrik Laine:   21.82 seconds

Auston Matthews:   12.28 seconds

Sidney Crosby:  10.73 seconds

Jeff Carter:  17.66 seconds

Patrick Kane: 18.95 seconds

FASTEST SKATER.

Cam Atkinson 13.33    vs

Nikita Kucherov 13.16

Bo Horvat 13.42 vs

Patrik Laine 13.43.    Patrik Laine clearly defeated Bo Horvat and would later be credited with the victory.

Wayne Simmonds 13.65      vs

Vincent Trocheck 13.32

Connor McDavid  13.02 vs

Nathan MacKinnon 13.62

Connor McDavid's  attempt to break Dylan Larkin's record of 13.12 seconds falls just short at 13.31 seconds.  Larkin had a moving start.  I'm just sayin'.

HARDEST SHOT COMPETITION

It ain't no hardest shot party without Al Iafrate.  Everybody gets two shots.

Patrik Laine :101.7 MPH, 101.5 MPH, vs

Brent Burns:  96.1 MPH, 97.7 MPH

Seth Jones 96.3 MPH, 98.1 MPH, vs

Viktor Hedman: 96.8 MPH, 94.2 MPH

Nathan MacKinnon 92.3 MPH, 89.9 MPH

Drew Doughty: 94.6 MPH, 92.7 MPH

Alex Ovechkin: (missed 1st attempt), 97.8 MPH vs.

Shea Weber: 102.8 MPH, 99.4 MPH

I somehow remember this going longer than it did this year..  Oh well.  Shea Weber wins again.

NHL SHOOTOUT

Key:  x = save, goal = goal.  Stay with us.

Brad Marchand vs. Mike Smith:  goal

Crew Doughty vs. Carey Price:  x

Nikita Kucherov vs. Mike Smith: x

Joe Pavelski vs. Carey Price:  x

Viktor Hedman vs. Mike Smith:  x

Bo Horvat vs. Carey Price:  x

Shea Weber vs. Mike Smith:  goal

Cam Fowler vs. Carey Price:  x

Franz Nielsen vs. Mike Smith:  x

Ryan Kesler's Kid vs. Carey Price:  goal.  It's weird hearing a Kings crowd cheer for a Duck, even if it's Kesler's kid.

Erik Karlsson vs. Martin Jones:  x

Connor McDavid vs. Tuukka Rask: x

Kyle Okposo vs. Martin Jones:  x

Johnny Gaudreau vs. Tuukka Rask:  x

Sidney Crosby vs. Martin Jones:  goal

Patrick Kane vs. Tuukka Rask:  x

Vincent Trocheck vs. Martin Jones:  x

Brent Burns vs. Tuukka Rask: x

Auston Matthews vs. Martin Jones:  x

Jeff Carter vs. Tuukka Rask: x

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The Atlantic Division wins the Super Skills Championship.  They will play the second game against the Metropolitan Division tomorrow.  This means the Pacific Division will play the Central Division in tomorrow's early game at 1:30 PM Mountain .  Don't miss that hot action.