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Oilers Lose. Ctrl C, Ctrl V

CBC television promises hockey game, delivers garden gnome tasting instead.

Perry Nelson-USA TODAY Sports

If it wasn't for the fact that most games seem to be like this, I'd swear I was cursed. Every time I volunteer to do a post game at the last minute, the Oilers are involved in a horrific example of terrible hockey. Sometimes they just get pasted, most times the game is about as exciting as watching the hair grow in my grandfathers ear.

I'm supposed to talk about the game, but aside from a couple of Hemsky rushes and a nice goal by David Perron all sandwiched between a pair of Sean Monahan goals off very Oiler-esque defensive play, the only thing worth talking about is how terrible some of the CBC employees are.

I know this is as old as the Oilers losing, but it terrifies me that in a country that devotes as much time to hockey as Canada, the CBC can get away with wasting money employing some of the stupidest people in the game.

Luke Gazdic fights Kevin Westgarth and in the ensuing 5 minute circle jerk that follows these things, Glenn Healy goes on to mention how after an entry level contract, most players don't re-sign with their team. Luke Gazdic did and that shows what great character he has.

I'll pause while you guys who have the game PVR'd (why?) or GCL go back and find it.

We good? So yeah, this is something Glenn Healy said on national television. I know I don't have to explain why this is stupid, but in the interests of intellectual honesty, I will.

In terms of most guys not re-signing after their ELC, it really has less to do with it being their decision than it does the team. See if the player chooses not to re-sign, he's still stuck with that organization for several more years. He doesn't just get to jump ship and do whatever he wants. Luke Gazdic didn't show character by re-signing, he showed a desire to continue to be a paid to play hockey (or whatever it is he does on the ice).

I also happened to notice during the fight that Gazdic was wearing a visor. I don't know if they let Grapes out of his cryo-chamber again for the late game (my default CBC 1st intermission move is to change channels), but I'll assume if he was, he commented on fighting with a visor.

The Flames first goal saw Ryan Nugent-Hopkins miss his assignment which allowed Monahan to come out from the corner and pick up his own rebound off a shot. Healy (quell suprise!), rants about how good the defensive play was until the very end. The player he blames? Not Nugent-Hopkins but instead the winger who came down to help. Granted Hall got all twisted and could have played it much better, but he was the last of a few errors on that shift (one in which Healy said there were lots of good things defensively).

Healy's expert assessment of Ales Hemsky is that you can't always stick handle the puck into the net, you need to have more dynamics. Like working the give and go. Right, Hemsky's issue is that he doesn't pass the puck enough.

Healy and Hrudey spent about 30 seconds fawning over how well Reto Berra (he of a .898 save percentage) has played so far this year, minus a bit of a hiccup after Christmas where he was tired because of the travel. This doesn't really explain his .888 save percentage in September.

I last somewhere in the range of 30 seconds into CBC's 2nd intermission before PJ Stock's highlight analysis included (paraphrased for effect) "I know it's against the rules and you aren't allowed to do it, but how can you call a penalty on that in OT?" after Bernier covered the puck well outside his crease. This isn't a slight hook 100 feet behind the play that just grazes the players hand and doesn't impact his ability to move at all, this is performing an illegal act right by (in this case on) the puck that takes away a potential scoring chance.

The most baffling thing about all of this is that most of these guys played at the NHL level. They participated in practices where they were instructed about how to play at the NHL level, participated in meetings where coaches would do the same thing they are doing, looking at video and describing what is happening. These aren't guys who grew up without hockey and were forced to learn the game of grainy youtube clips 20 minutes before having to analyze a game. TSN (who in fairness has a couple of dolts as well), has some of the better analysts around and THEY AREN'T EVEN GOING TO BE ABLE TO SHOW GAMES ANYMORE AFTER THIS YEAR!!!

I guess the good news is that the rest of Canada can know what it feels like to watch something they love be turned into a complete shit show and filled with stupidity for 10 years...